UselessFinds
The Lizard Man Climbing Out Of Your Wall

33cm of unwelcome guest

Novelty Homeware

The Lizard Man Climbing Out Of Your Wall

A green swamp-creature torso that mounts on a wall or shelf so it appears to be hauling itself into the room. 33cm wide.

Buy this nonsense$44.89$20.65(sponsored link, opens in a new tab)
  • monster decor
  • halloween prop
  • wall mount
  • lizard man
  • creature
  • horror decor

What Is This Thing?

A resin sculpture of a scaly humanoid — head, shoulders, two clawed arms — with no body behind it. It measures 33cm across and 23cm tall, and it is built to be mounted so that the missing half is hidden by whatever it is mounted on.

Fixed to a wall it reads as a creature pulling itself through the plaster. Set on a shelf or a garden rock it reads as something surfacing. The listing photos show it above a framed picture, on a mantelpiece among gourds, wedged into tree bark and half-submerged in a rockery, and it works in all four because the illusion only needs an edge to hide behind.

Why You Don't Need It

It is a wall ornament of a swamp monster. It hangs there. It has no light, no sound, no motion and no season — you cannot even claim it is a Halloween decoration you will pack away in November, because nothing about it says October.

Why You'll Buy It Anyway

Most horror decor announces itself. It is orange and purple, it has a cobweb on it, and everyone understands the frame they are in. This one does not announce anything. It is a green thing at head height that people see out of the corner of an eye, and the reaction it gets is not a laugh but a very short pause.

Mounted well it also gets funnier over time rather than less funny, because guests stop noticing it and new guests do not.

The Lizard Man Climbing Out Of Your Wall — photograph 2
The Lizard Man Climbing Out Of Your Wall — photograph 3

Who It's Actually For

Anyone who has run out of wall. It is for the person whose house is already full of odd objects and needs something at eye level, for a home bar or a games room where the tone is already set, and for a garden where it can sit in ivy and catch people on the path.

It is a bad idea for a household with small children who will meet it at their own head height in a dark hallway.

before you click buy

Work out the mounting before it arrives — the piece is designed to hide its own bottom edge, so it needs a wall fixing, a shelf lip, or a rock to sit against. Propped upright on a flat surface it stops being a creature emerging and becomes a broken statue.

Check the weight and the material description too. Resin at this size and this price is usually hollow, which is good for the wall and bad if it lives outdoors in wind.

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